Moving to a new country introduces any newcomer to a new way of living. Norms and ways of thinking that were never questioned because of its familiarity are cast in a new light.
At first, I admit that I felt uncomfortable with these. There is a bit of an undeniable knee-jerk defensive reaction. I couldn’t help but feel threatened that my world view was being challenged. But I realized that I just had to embrace the variety and that every new idea contains a gem of wisdom. Here are some concepts that I am learning outside my upbringing, that is helping me realize there is really no one way to live one’s life.
Having other reasons outside religion to explain things or motivate behaviour
In my elementary and high school years in catholic schools in the Philippines we had Religion class. Human behaviour, what to do or not do is framed from the perspective of following God’s word as stated in the Bible. Living in Canada provided me with the opportunity to be exposed to other reasonings. The concept of ethics is something I wasn’t introduced to until I moved here, as well as philosophy and other schools of thought.
The role of psychology and upbringing, I learned, plays a huge role in people’s lives, habits, and reasoning. Being trauma-informed is something that we are encouraged to apply at work all the time. Cycles of abuse, pain and trauma can cascade to other people and environments if left unaddressed. Conversations about mental health are more prevalent these days, and admittedly, it raises challenging questions about how to determine personal responsibility and influences outside one’s control.
The importance of self-care
I think part of this is not just based on being a Filipino, but also the socio-economic status I grew up in. It is an ongoing journey to convince myself that saying ‘no’ can be a good thing. Most of my elders work so hard and sacrifice so much that it can be worrisome, like they would just fall apart in exhaustion any second. This is a significant reason why I don’t always know when or how to rest and relax.
Taking a break is worthwhile. Keeping my own self healthy, happy, and stable is an important foundation in doing good work and having a positive impact on other people. ‘You can’t pour from an empty cup’ is the saying that comes to my mind. Embracing the word ‘self-care’ is part of the process, and to remind myself that it is not selfish is another feat altogether.
Inclusiveness, especially for those who are typically discriminated
Bullying, hurtful words towards gay and lesbian people were familiar in my childhood years. Snide comments about people with Chinese, Indian or Arab origins was common. Making fun of someone who looks or acts ‘crazy’ was encouraged. I remember people around me when I was growing up who were quite harsh towards these people.
While hotly debated, the concept of being politically correct is worth considering. Perhaps, part of this is the fact that here in Canada, Filipinos can be subjected to stereotypes also, and the realization that it is hurtful to be subjected to outdated, inaccurate comments. Whether it is based on class, race, sexual orientation, history of severe hardship, physical and mental ability, there seems to be more initiatives here that encourage inclusiveness and I appreciate its value. For myself, the biggest learning curve is filling the gaps in my knowledge about the history and current challenges of the Indigenous peoples that lived in this country before European colonization. That being said, the multitude of activities, events and various types of media to spread awareness is more accessible these days.
